tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post2670240721171723682..comments2023-11-02T11:57:59.927-04:00Comments on Straight Guise: Men Against Sexual Violence: Sexually Abused MalesDr. Joe Korthttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08656437986661601760noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-69240314101071179622008-08-17T23:57:00.000-04:002008-08-17T23:57:00.000-04:00Stranger,We do disagree in that Reparative Therapy...Stranger,<BR/><BR/>We do disagree in that Reparative Therapy in its Orthodox form (see www.NARTH.com) is very anti-gay and they see nothing positive about homosexuality. <BR/><BR/>I wish it were true that they would simply address the men who are not gay but have sex with other men who want to change. However they clearly state that every man who has same sex attractions--gay, bisexual and otherwise--should change and be heterosexual. <BR/><BR/>You were lucky if those you worked with did not communicate this to you. However, for most they directly speak against any form of homsexual behavior for anyone and they leave no room for someone to affirmatively identify as gay or lesbian or even bisexual.Dr. Joe Korthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08656437986661601760noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-75635618730294659462008-05-07T18:53:00.000-04:002008-05-07T18:53:00.000-04:00Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's l...Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's long ago. This is a reality and a level most don't get to. <BR/><BR/>I feel the same way you do with some differences. It's very interesting because the LGBT community really didn't listen to me--I am just denying I am gay to them. <BR/><BR/>Sometimes I wonder if I'm caught in a trap. But, if sexuality is on a continium, then you don't have to lable yourself and just get help with relationships with women.<BR/><BR/>I'm in a different boat. I get along with women fine. I find myself oddly emotionally attracted to women and physically attracted to men. Its so perplexing. I've done some repairative therapy too which is really not dangerous at all. Its not gay hate, its just for men who want a different path. I'm still though not sure where I fall. <BR/><BR/>Funny, isn't it? When others are sure where you fall and you yourself are not. I don't have all the answers either but you can read my blog and see my journey. I haven't talked about sexuality in awhile but read earlier posts.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13386725044389346135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-62368599626942751802008-05-07T18:50:00.000-04:002008-05-07T18:50:00.000-04:00Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's l...Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's long ago. This is a reality and a level most don't get to. <BR/><BR/>I feel the same way you do with some differences. It's very interesting because the LGBT community really didn't listen to me--I am just denying I am gay to them. <BR/><BR/>Sometimes I wonder if I'm caught in a trap. But, if sexuality is on a continium, then you don't have to lable yourself and just get help with relationships with women.<BR/><BR/>I'm in a different boat. I get along with women fine. I find myself oddly emotionally attracted to women and physically attracted to men. Its so perplexing. I've done some repairative therapy too which is really not dangerous at all. Its not gay hate, its just for men who want a different path. I'm still though not sure where I fall. <BR/><BR/>Funny, isn't it? When others are sure where you fall and you yourself are not. I don't have all the answers either but you can read my blog and see my journey. I haven't talked about sexuality in awhile but read earlier posts.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13386725044389346135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-80124582521093022842008-05-07T18:49:00.000-04:002008-05-07T18:49:00.000-04:00Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's l...Anonymous, I am glad you posted! And I know it's long ago. This is a reality and a level most don't get to. <BR/><BR/>I feel the same way you do with some differences. It's very interesting because the LGBT community really didn't listen to me--I am just denying I am gay to them. <BR/><BR/>Sometimes I wonder if I'm caught in a trap. But, if sexuality is on a continium, then you don't have to lable yourself and just get help with relationships with women.<BR/><BR/>I'm in a different boat. I get along with women fine. I find myself oddly emotionally attracted to women and physically attracted to men. Its so perplexing. I've done some repairative therapy too which is really not dangerous at all. Its not gay hate, its just for men who want a different path. I'm still though not sure where I fall. <BR/><BR/>Funny, isn't it? When others are sure where you fall and you yourself are not. I don't have all the answers either but you can read my blog and see my journey. I haven't talked about sexuality in awhile but read earlier posts.Strangerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13386725044389346135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-54958583662713720572008-03-09T00:47:00.000-05:002008-03-09T00:47:00.000-05:00Found this blog interesting and helpful. But I sti...Found this blog interesting and helpful. But I still ask myself as a man now 55 but as a boy abused for many several years ages 12+ why have I ended up in what would be regarded as a homosexual relationship. I always wanted a relationship with a female -always ended in disaster. I believe I have never recovered from what happened to me etc. I have never had any success with females (as partners and yes, not really as friends either) and in the end I just discovered the gay scene when I was around 28. But I have always idolised the fairer sex!. I get bitter that people presume I am gay. At the very least you could argue I was bisexual etc but I do think even that is not really true, if I had been given a choice as I grew up. But I honestly believe I am not gay but have hid in this world because I cant feel secure in the straight world etc.ie less threatened more accepted (but only if I pretend I am gay in that world). But now I just have a male partner friend (he knows I definetly prefer women) and dont frequent the gay scene etc. I have no idea why I am posting this but I still search for answers on how to relate to people normally. <BR/>Anyhow I did find this blog interesting and helpful. I suppose if anyone sees this they may also find they can relate to some of how I feel? But please dont just tell me I am in denial as this makes absolutely no sense to me. I would have kille to have met the right girl and do the normal things that heterosexual couples live. My world has never been happy but I do have a very long lasting friendship with a gay man (close to 30 years). But no I dont have any other friends and that just kills me at times!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8375344096409031979.post-37188988867672809652008-01-28T15:14:00.000-05:002008-01-28T15:14:00.000-05:00Great myth busting, and great link. (It seems to b...Great myth busting, and great link. (It seems to be linked incorrectly, however, on your post; I think blogger sometimes does that). <BR/><BR/>There are also some great books out there for male survivors. An autobiography I read that I found particularly moving was Sheldon Kennedy's "Why I didn't say anything" http://www.amazon.ca/Why-Didnt-Say-Anything-Sheldon/dp/1897178077 <BR/><BR/>Kennedy did a great job of showing the complexities male survivors (and survivors in general) experience.<BR/><BR/>In my experience (I am a sexual assault/abuse therapist), men and boys are really hit with the "you are going to be an offender" myth, as well as homophobia / "you are going to turn out gay" - both of which are often well internalized. <BR/><BR/>Just as there needs to be greater awareness about sexual violence in general, so does there need to be greater awareness about male survivors, specifically.<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the education!Monikahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12173874298223506765noreply@blogger.com