Monday, August 27, 2007

Becoming the Men They Were Meant To Be: Helping Sexually Abused Males

Approximately one in six boys is sexually abused before age 16. Often males who have been sexually traumatized and/or abused behaviorally act out homosexually—also known as homosexual imprinting. Some of these males are gay and most are not. Males who have been sexually abuse are often confused as to their sexual orientation because of the trauma. These men—both gay and straight—re-enact the trauma through homosexual behavior as adults. The new term for these men are MSM (Men having sex with men).

Resources for sexually abused men:


Author and Psychotherapist Richard Gartner

Author and Psychotherapist Mike Lew



Anonymous said...

How does a man begin to see himself as a victim of sexual abuse rather than a willing, repeat participant?

At the age of 15-16 y/o I became sexually involved with a gay man about 40 years older than me. Even though the idea of a homosexual encounter was appealing to me. I was left feel ashamed and unfulfilled. I never shared a romantic/emotional love or caring for the man, it was only sex.

How can I see this as abuse (besides the age difference) rather than repeat, meaningless homosexual behavior?

Anonymous said...

Dear dr. Kort, please can you tell me how to make the distinction between a straight male who is acting out his sexual abuse and a gay male who is reenacting his sexual abuse?thank you

Joe Kort said...

To me for the first comment it is the age difference like you said that would make it abuse.

However your response to what happen may, in fact, not be trauma and for you it might be repeat, meaningless homosexual behavior. However, you are lucky because most suffer trauma and incredible shame not because it is two males but because of the power, control and dominance of the age difference. usually 15-16 year olds are not developmentally ready to what a 40 year old introduces to him.

Joe Kort said...

I plan to write a piece on how to tell whether you are a straight male who is acting out his sexual abuse (Homosexual Imprinting which only refers to the behaviors) and a gay male who is re-enacting his abuse.

It is a great question which I prefer to address in a blog entry soon. Thanks for asking the question.